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Step Away from the Cookie!

OMG!  I’m sitting here thanking the Lord for good timing and great friends.  By the sounds of that you’d think something life threatening had just occurred, right?  Nope, just the threat of me giving into leaving my body once again.

I posted on my boards earlier, “I had some outer body experiences yesterday.  I realized after journaling and making the comment, ‘driven by an outside force’ that I was in fact leaving my body again.  Therefore my body was on auto pilot.  What should I expect?  If I leave it, it HAS to run somehow.” 

This afternoon I spent the day with my mom catching up on the BGL from last week.  The looks on these contestants faces as they realize just how hard this is, the physical part especially.  Going from sedentary and completely out of shape to running sprints and insane circuits, and GOD ( and Jillian and Bob) only know what else… it’s gotta be tough with little time for mental and physical adjustment.  I found myself empathizing with them. 

I know how tough it is.  I know how much you have to change your mental state just to make it through a workout.  Some days it takes all your mental strength just to get out the door.  You have to have the mental power to survive and continue.  Your strength comes mostly from your mind, I’ve learned.

As I’m reflecting on my own beginning I asked myself how did I do it.  Just watching these contestants makes me want to go take a nap.  How did I do it and how do I continue to do it?  I remember the fatigue, the physical discomfort you have to get used to and the thoughts of wanting to quit (in the beginning). 

The answer is simple really.  I knew change would not happen until I first stepped out of my comfort zone.  I first took this idea as a general rule.  You know, if you don’t step out of your comfort zone while training, you won’t push the muscles to spark new growth.  But as I progressed in my fat loss journey I came to understand this one rule is crucial for ALL changes, not just muscle growth.

In an instant I had yet another “aha” moment, small albeit but “aha” nonetheless.  I had been asking myself all day yesterday and into today, “why can’t I just put the cookie down!?”  I feel compelled to eat it!  WHY!?  It’s a freakin’ cookie.  I know I won’t enjoy it later.  I know the ramifications of this cookie.  In fact I even know I’ll feel much worse mentally and physically after I eat.  SO why do I still want this damn cookie!?  

I think not only am I on auto pilot because I’ve checked-out of my body, it’s also a habit.  It’s uncomfortable to go against what is habit, no matter what it is.  I need to step out of my comfort zone with this cookie.  I just need to do as Geneen Roth says and feel the uncomfortable feelings.  I’m pretty sure I’d find I’m using food to mask deeper issues, even if it’s as simple as a nap!  I also don’t believe I have to analyze it every time I feel like eating.  I should just start breaking the habits by stepping out of this zone I’ve stepped into.  It really is that simple.  Just step out!

I got home and thought I’d put this into practice, because, after all it makes perfect sense.  As soon as I walk in the door I grab the cookies!  I’ll just have one more!  I promise you I’m quite sure I would have had 2 or 3 more. 

When I sat down to my computer to “enjoy” this one more cookie, I saw an IM from my friend saying, “how you doin yo? listening to you?”  I told her to tell me to step away from the cookie.  She did and all is well now.  Talk about timing!  Thank the LORD!  Yes, uncomfortable, but so glad I had some help this time. 

I’m stepping out of what is not comfortable and listening again.  My body is tired and I can see I could use a power nap.  I’ve got some other things on my mind that I’m sure are contributing to the feeling of needing comforted.  I suppose I just need to be more aware.  Security is raised to Code Red!

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