Chill, Nervous, Tired, Excited
I feel like I’m running out of energy. Exactly 24 days to show day. Eeeeeek! Carbs have been at 50grams for 5 days now (I get 100 carbs today! PARTY!). 2-a-days started this week also. But what’s killing me more than any of that is my husband isn’t sleeping! He tosses, snores, smacks his lips, etc. every (no joke) 30 seconds to 1 minute until 2 am! Then my alarm goes off at 5:45am. Not freakin’ cool! And it’s REALLY starting to wear on me. I wake up exhausted and pissed off! I know I can’t be mad at him, it’s not intentional. He’s pretty stressed out and I’m sure that’s part of what’s going on. But I have to find a remedy so I can rest… or surely I’ll crash and burn.
I’m also having really consistent cramps in my calves and feet since the 5k. I assume I lost too much water, which is why I hit the 151 and soon after my weight climbed back up to 153. I’m going to email Joe about that. I’ve been taking all my minerals and vitamins.
My status today on FB was “I feel chill and nervous all at the same time”. I feel chilll because I can’t do anything, other than what I’m doing. I’m in acceptance mode. I’m not happy with my progress in the time that I was allowed to come in for this show, but I can’t change the past now. I have 3 weeks to come in for this show and I’m doing everything I can at the moment – it is what it is…. and that’s that. I feel nervous because time is moving so quickly. Posing has me feeling less than confident this year, because once again, I’m starting out too late. Even though my intentions were set at 10 weeks out, real posing has only just begun. We’re working on walking today – LORD help me!
So back to the weight… 153 this morning. But I swear I see changes in my abdomen. Just for the record… the scale sucks! But what’s messed up is my measurements aren’t showing it either. I’m going to take pics this weekend and send them off to Joe again. Will update with what he sees.
And my best news so far is… we’ve made enough money this summer to take a vacation! I booked our flight, our car, and our hotel! The only thing I didn’t take into cosideration was I’ll look like a lepar (tan will be wearing off) and really… I don’t even care! NICE! I haven’t had a real vacation in FOREVER!!!!! This is my treat for all my hard work, my husbands hard work and support, and my kids who have supported me through all this as well. Not to mention my 12yr old has been my photo journalist. We’re gettin’ the heck out of Dodge! WOOHOOOO!
Okay… back to competition prep brain. FOCUSED… Ohhhhmmmmm….